The Dirtsmith Knowledge Panel
Crikey! Out of fucking nowhere, I just discovered I have a knowledge panel!!!
What is a knowledge panel, you may ask?
It’s the thingy that pops up at the top of a page of search engine results when you do a Google search on something with enough ‘some’ to be –
The Dirtsmith Knowledge Panel
AN ENTITY!
This means that now I am officially SOMETHING! At least according to Google. But in this enlightened techno-epoch, it’s safe to conclude that if something cannot be located anywhere in all the Starry Googleverse, for all intents and purposes it does not exist.
And by the same token, if Google thinks you are something, then goddammit, you are SOMETHING!
It feels so good to have one’s existence validated by the Allmind.
Alright. In all fairness, if you do a Google search just by the term “Dirtsmith,” that’s not what’s gonna pop up. Instead you will get this –
BUT! Should you opt to click on the icon at the top for Dirtsmith (Musical Artist), it would take you to the page with the Knowledge Panel.
Now, rest assured that I have been wandering around showing off my brand new Knowledge Panel to all and sundry like a total ass hat, just to make sure everyone fully appreciates my status as an Official Entity. But I AM capable of appreciating how remarkably unimpressive my Knowledge Panel really is.
To put things in perspective, my buddy Jason is in a band called The Oxys. This is what THEIR Knowledge Panel looks like –
Damn. That’s a pretty sweet Knowledge Panel! It’s easily 20 times better than mine. But then again, there’s five of them so of course they have to figure out a way to split that amongst themselves.
Well, there you go. Enjoy your evening. I shall return to basking in the glorious revelation of my own existence.
